| The other day my friend Dan pulled up a shit-ton of weather charts from NOAA in programming class in favor of playing video games like we're supposed to be, and I couldn't help but think to myself, "Why the hell does he give a shit? There's a storm bordering off of northern Florida. Big fucking deal." Then, it struck me.
Daniel was either concerned about the well-being of other people, or he was mentally cheering "YOU! CAN! GO! ALL! THE! WAY!" Assuming that he hasn't completely disregarded my teachings (both in programming and in the dark side of the Force), he has the right idea. The only reason anyone ever watches the weather channel is to find out how to avoid the shit themselves, and to wish hailstorms and twisters upon whatever town their shitty relatives live in.
So I've been thinking: what if it wipes out Orlando and Disney World? My dad said, "It couldn't happen to a nicer place." I agree-- let's hope this one hits the record books. I hate Orlando almost as much as I hate riding through Sarasota.
No punchline here. I'm just wishing pain, misery, and destruction on the city of Orlando. I hope it tears the whole fucking city to the ground. Get Miami too, while you're at it. Wipe out all the Cuban gangs and asshole lawyers that live there.
Hell, wipe out the whole fucking state. Less old people means less people, which in turn means less people to piss me off. If you disagree with this, feel free to send me some hate mail-- I ran out of toilet paper. |
