I'm not saying Insane Clown Posse (ICP for short) is a group of talentless hacks who stumbled into financial success-- well, I'm not JUST saying that-- I also recognize the fact that I would have a higher respect for the band if the fans weren't a bunch of whiny Gothics who think they're "ghetto."

You probably know what I'm talking about already, but in case you don't, here's a Venn diagram which I feel best describes what a "Juggalo" truly is: Why do I hate Juggalos so much? Because they think it means something special.

Once upon a time, there was this big goofy moron who went to school with Omen. I believe his name was Sneaky-Snake (correct me if I'm wrong, Omen). Sneaky-Snake thought he was tough shit and Omen basically told him "Whatever. Shut up; I'm busy." every time he tried to brag about how "ghetto" he was in front of Omen. As a result, he got pissy and tried to get one of Omen's closest friends to betray him. His reasoning? "Hey man... we're both Juggalos, right? Wanna help me kick bitch-boy Omen's ass?"

This isn't just an isolated incident. These morons have it in their head that "we're both Juggalos!" translates to "We're part of some super-secret club that means we must defend complete strangers who are also a member of the aforementioned club against our closest friends... because we have one band in common interest." Not only is this type of thinking dangerous, it's also very, very stupid.

A few years ago, I used to listen to ICP. Then I realized there are talented musicians out there and quit forcing myself to listen to that dog-shit music. The difference between me then and Juggalos now is that they know other bands exist and opt to listen to 35 year-old men talking about sticking their nuts in a girl's butt at a carnival. It isn't cute, it isn't funny, and it isn't quality. Your taste in music sucks.

Not only are they whiny, obnoxious, and stupid; Juggalos are also pretentious. Instead of being just "ICP fans" they insist on being called Juggalos and being treated as a separate social group. I can't help but agree with this point: Not only should you be treated as a social group, you should also be discriminated as one. Enjoy your beatings, asshole.

People like this are the reason I want to build a device that releases an EMP in a general direction... just so I can combat those of us who like to blare their shitty music at red lights.