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On my way to History class today, some idiots asked me if I wanted a free rose. I glanced over at their booth and saw they were trying to guilt people into taking a free Bible with the rose. Simple psychological strategies don't work on me, but unlike the other idiots at my school, I wouldn't have taken a flower anyway. I don't like flowers, and I don't want to give them to anyone. If I want someone to know I don't hate them, I'll talk to them! Time is our scarcest commodity. The very act of spending time with another person is more meaningful than any bullshit candy, dying flower, or useless gift.
Some people like to use these meaningless scraps of material as a conversation starter. That's because those people are unbearably dull, unknowledgeable, and unimaginative. I've never use a conversation piece. If I'm at a loss for words starting a conversation, I'll flip open my laptop. Information is more interesting than junk. Which is why I can't stand Valentine's Day.
![[Valentine's Day Card]](vdaycard.png)
Valentine's Day is a bullshit holiday that sets itself apart from most bullshit holidays by having absolutely no redeeming qualities. On February 14, all the couples exchange cheap gifts and sexual favors in as close to the public eye as they can legally get away with. Then come the fucking cards: Jokes that rank slightly above Carlos Mencia on the Comedometer and stupid lovey-dubby bullshit in quantities large enough to solve the energy crisis.
You would think that after several years of seeing the same jokes and poems repackaged in different fonts and with different clip art, people would begin to realize how shallow and worthless Valentine's Day is. Unfortunately, this is not the case. Year after year, Valentine's Day proves highly profitable for the candy and greeting card industries.
The ironic part about all this is that most of the dopes who buy their whores a large box of chocolates, a $6 card that costs $0.25 to make, and a teddy bear with heart-shaped eyes wouldn't know romance if it cup-checked them. All the worthless trinkets and heart-clogging snacks in the world won't compensate for being a piece of shit. Go ahead and surrender your balls to rampant commercialism in the hopes of getting laid, dipshit. When you throw all your money away and have nothing left to show for it, maybe you'll realize that your expressions of affection meant nothing. Who am I kidding? These jerk-offs are too stupid to learn this lesson. The profit margins of the candy companies alone are enough evidence of that.
In short, fuck Valentine's Day and everyone who's shallow enough to celebrate it.
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