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When it came to pure, unadulterated bullshit, I've heard it all. At least, that's what I thought up until yesterday, when I read that atheist blogger PZ Myers was receiving death threats because he insulted a cracker.
For those of you who don't feel like reading what he wrote, I'll summarize the incident for you:
- A Catholic student (Mr. Cook) decided not to eat a communion cracker at the altar (he first wanted to show it to his non-Catholic friend).
- Mr. Cook was assaulted.
- Death threats were made on Mr. Cook's life.
- PZ Myers tried to rationalize the whole incident, despite its absurdity.
- The Catholic League-- a group of litigating assholes who try to make every one of the billion Catholics in the world seem like they're being singled out and victimized-- decides to publish a press release containing a link to the email address of the President of the University that Myers works for, demanding censure.
- Catholic blow-hards flood Myers's inbox with stupid bullshit, call him intolerant, and threaten to kill him.
There's so much bullshit here that its density could be compared to a neutron star. Not only are these morons demanding that he lose his job for something he wrote on a website that is not related to the University Myers works at, not only are they threatening his life, but they actually have the audacity to write things like this:
"Perhaps Prof. Myers should try desecrating the Koran next time ... or perhaps you should censure him, and let him know that 21st century people don't go bashing other folks religious beliefs."[link]
This person is actually suggesting that Myers desecrate the Koran; implying that it was better to do that than to satirically suggest that you would like to desecrate a piece of tasteless dough given out for free (which is somehow a "hate crime").
I'm not as nice of a guy as Professor Myers, especially in situations like this, so I can't just let this go without speaking my mind to the Catholic League for causing this unprecedentedly huge pile of bullshit:
I also made a second version of this image that looks better on a white background.
What's so sacred about a flavorless wafer? Apparently it's supposed to turn into a piece of "the body of Christ" when a priest blesses it. Sounds awesome, doesn't it? Why don't we take an unblessed wafer and a blessed wafer and run them both through a spectrometer? Oh, what's that, Mr. Apologetic? The whole "body of Christ" bullshit is symbolic? Alright, fair enough.
But if the wafer's not literally a piece of a man who lived 2,000 years ago, then how in the hell does not eating it immediately count as a "hate crime" and "kidnapping?" And if something is given to you, then how is it "theft"? Something's not adding up. Furthermore, how does this justify assaulting a person and sending them death threats?
Let's not stop there: How does pointing out the inanity of this issue and saying in satire and protest[link] justify censure and threatening that person with death?
There is no logic behind any of it, on any level. This is bona fide bull-shit! There's no way around using that phrase. Bill Donohue and the rest of these semi-conscious fuck-wits need to pull their head out of their ass and get with the program.
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