Some people wear their religion on their sleeve; Huckabee might as well tattoo it to his forehead:

This picture is obviously photoshopped; before anyone asks.

If you're nonreligious (atheist, agnostic, or otherwise) or believe in something other than Christianity, Huckabee probably isn't your first choice. After all, who wants the head of the executive branch of our government stepping on your toes? But it goes so far beyond his exclusive appeal to Christians.

In August of 2004, Huckabee earned a spot on Evil Bible's Retard of the Month. Chris, the owner of Evil Bible, reports that Huckabee released criminals upon their conversion to Christianity and didn't support the mental health system because he, apparently, believes that mental patients just need to find God to get better (read more).

"Hey, I have a great idea!" says the Republican party, "Let's take the guy who pardons psychopaths and criminals after giving them religion-- and therefore a personal justification for committing crimes-- a chance to become President!" It's like they decide who they vote for on drunken bets.

Note: I didn't change the shape of his head; I just rotated the pear.

This just in: public opinion about the Iraq conflict are at an all-time low. McCain's reaction? "We could be in Iraq for a hundred years." Enough said.

Above: the phony bitch caught in the act of patronizing some old bastard with her high-pitched laugh.

I can't stand to look at this woman or hear her speak. Every word she speaks, every breath she takes, and every vote she garners from the elderly population looks so artificial. She's either a robot or a moron-- I can't decide which. What I do know is that she's a phony, patronizing bitch who dodges every issue presented to her.

When I set out to write this article, I didn't have much to work with for Obama. Sure, there's the chain emails, but unfortunately I'm a regular reader at Snopes so I couldn't force myself to believe them if I wanted to.

Then, this came along.

If Wikipedia says it, it must be true!

There you have it; Barack Obama was responsible for 9/11 and we should listen to every uncreative asshole who says, "Obama? More like OSAMA!!! Haha I'm witty... and so alone!"